Author Topic: a little humor  (Read 2008 times)

Offline Bourne Bill

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a little humor
« on: March 03, 2011, 02:56:25 PM »
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TS18997
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Flower Mound, Tx
Posts: 621
 No Sex Since 1955

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NO SEX SINCE 1955

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a
local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely
young idealistic liberal ladies in attendance, one of whom approached
the Sergeant Major for conversation.

"Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious
man.. Is something bothering you?" "Negative,
ma'am. Just serious by nature.."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks
like you have seen a lot of action." "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."
The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You
know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy
yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.
Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this
the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?

"1955, ma'am."

"Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You
really need to chill out and relax! I mean no sex since 1955!
Come with me." She took his hand and led him to a private room
where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

Afterward, panting for breath, she leaned against his grizzled bare
chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since
1955."

The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his
watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."


Gotta love military time
Life is short, eat dessert first...........

Offline BK

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Re: a little humor
« Reply #1 on: March 03, 2011, 06:12:33 PM »
 :lol: :lol: :lol:  :clap:
If it aint broke, don't fix it!

Offline Troutsqueezer

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Re: a little humor
« Reply #2 on: March 10, 2011, 04:15:00 PM »
Two guys were discussing their aging wives. One was quite sure his wife was going deaf. The other guy gave him a suggestion to test her hearing. "Here's what you do.

Start about 40 feet away from her and speak in a normal conversational tone and see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet and so on until you get a response".

So that evening, she's in the kitchen cooking dinner and he's in the living room and he says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens".

"Honey, what's for supper?" No response. So, he moves to the other end of the room, about 30 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?" No response.

So he moves into the dining room, about 20 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?" No response. On to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for supper?" No response. So he walks up right behind her.

"Honey, what's for supper?"

"FOR THE FIFTH TIME, CHICKEN!!"
-Dennis-
Once you see the bandwagon, it's too late.

Offline Bernd

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Re: a little humor
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2011, 08:06:16 PM »
 :lol:   :lol:   :lol:   :lol:   :lol:       :ddb:

What?

Bernd
You can't fix "STUPID".